I don't like this project as it is.

But I can't deny that this effort is really what started LUCY and has the seeds of noise and drone that will be continued in the upcoming trilogy.

I'm proud, honestly — that with the era of four-piece LUCY, that this project is what is to show for it. And I think if we were to have gone in the direction of this record and refined the approach to noise, experimental rock and drone over some time... we would have undoubtedly created records outside of the mainstream and... who knows? Maybe we would've spearheaded a new kind of harsh noise with artists like Uboa.

This kind of raw, violent, sexual sorta lyricism is something I've more or less matured from. Being 17 at the time this was created, there is an obvious sense of immaturity and toxicity that sours this record for me. I know this is me saying all this stuff. But I cringe. Quite hard. I've never listened to this ever since. Yet, some songs like "Messier Numbers", "Fenfen" and "Track" are songs I have some fondness for.

And I don't wanna discredit the musicianship of the other members on this record. Even if they admittedly did not do a lot on this record for any given reason, the friendship that we had *did* inform the sound and production. For all intents and purposes, this was meant to be (and in some way, is) a group project.

Here's a list of people that inspired it during release: James Chance & Contortions, Teenage Jesus, Mars, DNA, mbv, Slowdive, Pia Fraus, Gnoomes, Gilla Band (fka Girl Band), Duster — and some Mingus, Mars Volta, and Bitches Brew-era Davis.

I don't know how to quite say this without sounding rude, but I'm glad the band broke up. I've learned to move on — even if I was abusive, manipulative and/or awful as a leader, I've given myself slack as I still was a kid. Not an excuse for what happened, yet I think I've finally forgiven myself. I've made sure not to be that person ever again.

Without the breakup, there wouldn't be the trilogy of self-produced singles that came out in 2021. There wouldn't be "Film". There wouldn't even be the Panda Rosa cover. And can you believe that CONTORTIONS was gonna come *BEFORE* this record? Yeah, that would've been a shit show. I'm glad this was made and not CONTORTIONS. Maturity and growing up has done a lot, and I can't wait to move on from adolescence in the upcoming trilogy.

Thank you to my bandmates who made this with me. Thank you to everyone who purchased this. Thank you to everyone who believed in this project. I'll see you when I see you.

Kaylon
9 April 2023